Who likes conflict? Osama Bin Laden is the only name that comes to mind. Most human beings hate conflict. We long for peace, not war. We want easy relationships, not fights and arguments. We naturally avoid conflict because it’s painful. It takes time. It’s uncomfortable. It’s risky. If I bring up an issue, people might think I consider myself better than they are. It might lead to even worse relationships. If I don’t tackle issues, I can live with the illusion that everything is OK even though it’s not. But if I face them, it will be obvious to everyone that there is a problem.
The result is that most people don’t face conflict. They just let it go. But not really. It bothers them so much they talk to everyone else about it. They seek advice on how to handle it. They ask for prayer. They hope it will go away. But they refuse to face it.
Angie and I learned in our marriage that the only way to a deeper relationship is the tunnel of conflict. We can’t grow closer if we continue to get right to the edge of a conflict but refuse to go through it. I’ve seen many marriages disintegrate because couples fight about the same issue again and again but refused to go all the way through the conflict to the intimacy on the other side. The next three weeks I will be preaching a series entitled, “Tunnel of Conflict.” Join us at Mobberly Baptist Church to hear what God’s Word says about handling conflict.